Sunday, 29 June 2014

Wild Things: Diamonds in the Rough (2005)

Like the second film, this third Wild Things more or less repeats the opening of the first.  I guess I'll give them credit for committing to their little motif.  The callbacks aren't quite as comprehensive this time, but the movie does at least introduce its best feature right out the outset: Dina Meyer, once more single-handedly attempting to turn trash into something watchable.

I'm not saying Meyer succeeds, mind you.  But she does try.

The other thing this film shares in common with the second (other than the by now predictable girl-girl-boy sex scene) is that it collapses under the weight of its own plot twists.  The scheme here is utterly, utterly nonsensical.  It's not only massively more complicated than it needs to be, but it relies on a degree of coincidence and contrivance that dwarfs the first film's machinations by a factor of about 15 times.

As usual, we have two young women with an apparently hostile relationship, but who are 'secretly' lovers.  I put secretly in quotes because there are at least two scenes where they make out in the high school showers: not exactly a recipe for keeping your relationship under the radar.

At stake this time is the rather paltry sum - by Wild Things standards - of $4 million.  That's half the prize in the first film, people!  Show some ambition!  Said money is locked up in a pair of diamonds that were left to one of the young women by her deceased mother, but which she cannot access because her stepfather is contesting the will.

Together with her partners in crime - which include a juvenile offender whose parole officer is played by Meyer - the heiress sets out to frame her step father for rape.  The plan is to convince him that he can buy off his accuser ... which as he lacks funds of his own, he can only do by signing away his rights to the diamonds and letting the heiress sell them.

Or at least, that's what the plan initially appears to be.  It's going to get much, much sillier before things are through.

Dina Meyer's presence raises this a notch above the second film, but can't disguise the fact that this is still nonsensical trash.

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